They say the the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. So why are you still doing it?
During a session with our counselors, my husband was told the above quote to something he is working through. Of course, my first response was, yea, why aren’t you making the changes that need to be made. However, the correct response that I needed to make was to look at my own life and see what things I was continuing to do that weren’t working, and figure out what needed to change.
The first thing I realized was I needed to change some things with my interaction with my children, They have a routine they are supposed to do every morning – yet they don’t do it w/o me reminding them to do so – every morning! So what do I need to do, to change this?
1) I need to get up when they get up. I have used my pregnancy as an excuse to sleep in, in the morning. If I get up when they do and I tell them to do their routine, it will be done before breakfast, not after.
2) I need to tell them today, that from now on, they are to do the routine every morning after they get up, whether or not I am up, and that they will be disciplined if they do not. The consequence should be that they miss out on something “fun” that day.
The next thing I realized was that I was not spending enough time / days in devotionals. Maybe one or two days per week. I don’t do well in the morning, usually falling back asleep, so I have to do them later in the day. What do I need to change so I can do daily or near daily devotionals?
1) I need to make devotionals a priority before I work on my blog or do afternoon projects. I am not allowed (with rare exception) to start working on my blog business or project until after I have spent time seeking what the Lord wants for me. And if He wants something different that day than my plan, then I need to be prepared to do it.
One more thing that I was seeing is that some interactions with my husband were getting strained and that I was trying to “get” from him instead of give.
1) To change this, I needed to change how I was dealing with him daily. When he gets home at night, no matter what I have been doing or how I feel (did I mention I was pregnant:-)), I choose to greet him as he comes in, ask what I can do to help him settle in for the evening, and what he would like to do tonight.
2) Anytime I feel I want something from him, I take it to the Lord instead. If what I need really is something I need and is good, the Lord will work through him or someone else to provide it, whether it is changing a faucet or just needing some affirmation.
I hope these examples will help you stop what you are doing today and examine what you are doing over and over again and are getting results you don’t like / want / need. See what you could do differently instead. I would love to hear your stories!